Today I reluctantly restarted several of my medications. This was quiet an emotional decision to make as for the last almost 7 weeks I had fought to preserve with breastfeeding; despite the hospital wanting to give him formula from the moment he was born. But I can’t deny that there has been a slight increase in my jaw and eye spasms, and it makes sense to hit this on the head now.
I know I have done well to get this far, but I still feel rather sad that we are now moving on, especially as over the last two weeks we had really got breastfeeding down to a much calmer event. The down side to having rare conditions is that not everyone who is involved with different aspects of my care has an in-depth understanding of just how my conditions affect me, despite my best efforts to inform them as best as I can. If people don’t want to familiarise themselves with the conditions there is not a lot that can be done about this. This sadly has meant that after a very short, under a minute-long eye spasm which I spoke through, a professional who witnessed the spasm presumed I had had a seizure (but didn’t think to discuss this with me) and contacted another member of my medical team causing a day of unnecessary drama and stress. Whilst this has all been cleared up now, I feel that this has left me with very little choice but to take my medicine again so I can prove I’m doing everything I can to prevent this my spasms.
I had a long chat with my GP yesterday as the whole thing left me feeling rather needlessly judged, after all people with epilepsy have children, as do people who are permentalty blind. Thankfully she is very familiar with all of my conditions, and although she would rather I continued to breastfeed she understood why I felt there was little other choice in the matter.
My botox appointment has come through for august so I’m looking forward to talking through my future treatment plan with my neurologist.